Rural

Rurrrerrr. Rerrrrl. Ruruu—rll? Dear the word “rural”, you suck.

Is that word supposed to be society’s twisted way of tagging the inbreds? I live in a rurrrl area. Not near the city, pretty rurrrrer. The word creators were like yeah, they live out in the country, they won’t know the difference between an actual word and incoherent Scooby Doo noises. Asshole word creators. It sounds like midway through your sentence you just decided to start drowning.  Ruueerrl. Even if you say the word super slow and enunciate clearly you still sound like a Siberian Husky in one of those videos of them trying to explain themselves after chewing up a couch. Reeerrrerer.

Aren’t the point of descriptive words to make language more convenient? I’d rather just be like “yeah, the geographical location I reside in is sparsely populated compared to somewhere that’s say, in or near a large city. More of a remote countryside type of area.” That’s easier to say than rerrrrrerl. Reeuurel. Rrrl. At least I won’t give off the impression that I’m picking a chunk of food out of my molars.

What do people think when they’re learning English and they’re like “So how do I describe an area pertaining to the country, you know, not near a big city?” Then the person teaching them English is like “Oh, we just say ruurrr.” How confusing must that be. We have words like “Circumcision” for chopping your cock, but when it comes to describing geographic locations we just say ruuurrrerr. That should actually be flipped now that I think about it.

“Oh, yeah, I live in more of a circumcised area now. I just got tired of how uncircumcised New York was.” See that’s much better.  And that would leave rural’s origin much more logical.

“Doctor? What are you doing?”

“Well. I’m slicing away the skin around his penis for a more sleek appearance.”

“Oh…wow. Okay I see. What is it called?”

*Snip*

Patient: “RUURRRRRERRRRRLLLAALLLRRRRUUURR!”