If you guys are ever looking for a way to just kill some time, and by kill some time I mean like really disrespectfully squeeze the life out of it before throwing it in the trash can and setting it on fire, you should think about checking out the SuperBowl pregame shows.

Talk about reaching.

Here we are at Superbowl… uh… can anyone here read roman numerals? Well, anyways, here we are at Superbowl 352. Patriots vs Eagles. Let’s jump right into things. Chris, we talked to Tom Brady before the game and you know what he said? Guess what he said, Chris. He went ahead and stated that he believes the Patriots WILL win this game. My opinion, Chris? As long as they score more points than the Eagles, Tom’s bold prediction just might become a reality. Let’s go down to Susie on the sideline.

Hey, Jim. The energy down here is really crazy, the people in the stands are extremely excited for this game, you know, the game that costs thousands of dollars to attend and is usually a once in a lifetime experience? Yeah, they seem pretty excited for it, which makes for a huge story line going into this game. But what the real scoop here is that during warm-ups Tom Brady took the field and some people noticed something strange going on with his shoelaces, Jim. Upon further investigation experts say that Tom’s left shoelace is actually three quarters of an inch SHORTER than his right shoelace. Yes, Jim, this is a huge development and something that we will be keeping a close eye on as he continues to warm-up. I asked head coach of the Eagles JimJoe McFootball what this could mean for him and his defense. He responded simply with these powerful words: “If we score more points than the Patriots, I think we have a shot at winning this thing”. Really incredible stuff, Jim, you couldn’t write a better story line. Back to you.

Wow, what a game we have on our hands here, Susie. As some of you may know, on top of the already amazing developments here today, temperatures have actually reached below zero here in Minnesota. Now, the game WILL be played in a temperature controlled dome set to exactly 72 degrees, but still. That’s pretty cold, Chris. Well, this has been quite the intense and action-packed pregame show but we still have approximately nine and a half hours left of coverage so we are now going to recap the 92 other SuperBowls that Tom Brady has been to prior to this one. We’ll see you guys at half time where we will let you know who is winning! Something tells me that whoever scores more touchdowns will probably be in the lead but I guess you guys will have to tune in and see for yourselves!Β 

 

 

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10 thoughts on “Are You Ready For Some Football?

  1. 🀣 A great summary of what we all really know…that all sports commentary and analysis is the most ludicrous load of cliched nonsense going! I think I will watch the event this afternoon but I have my doubts about just how real the sport actually is…I’m not convinced at times that it isn’t an elaborate orchestration much like WWE…but I hope not.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Whatever happened to just boradcasting the game and reporting on what happens on the fiield? I hate pre game shows, post game shows, and the endless cable ananlysis of what has happened, will happen or could happen. I never watch any of it. That goes for the sub par entertainment during half time. The commercials aren’t even very good anymore. Just give me the game!

    Liked by 2 people

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